Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
