yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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