just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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