we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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