week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
