I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
