Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
