I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
