I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
