It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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