Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
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