so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
