After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
