the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
