the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
