does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize