Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize