she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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