It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
