Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
