Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
