yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
