ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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