Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Randomize
