where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
