And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
