Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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