brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
