did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
