and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
