I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
