You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
