gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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