love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
