nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Randomize
