In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
