Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
