there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
