This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize
