Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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