We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
