Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
