it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize
