We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
