Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
she pinky promised me she was 18
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
