come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
