You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
