I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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