I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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