I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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